Don’t Get Married, And Other Advice From a 9 Year Old

I was recently babysitting at a dear friends of mine’s house. As always I was having a blast playing with toys. When else does a 19 year old get an excuse to watch a movie, play with dolls and enjoy a good board game? If you are stressed I recommend taking up occasional babysitting, because it is scientifically proven to reduce stress levels. Ok the research was conducted by me on myself, but that doesn’t really matter. Anyway back to the main point. I was in the pantry down on my knees looking for something. When I got up my knees were not very happy with me for kneeling on the floor for so long


“Whats wrong Leslie”

“I am old Em and my bones don’t like kneeling as much as they used to.

“Your not old Leslie, you are only 18?”

“I am actually 19 and yes I do feel old.”

“Well you aren’t even married yet!”

Thanks to a nine year old I now know the solution to never aging. Being the unselfish person that I am, I willingly pass on this information to you. Your welcome. If you are already married or like some of my friends who are getting married soon, I want to warn you to consider the consequences of years of bliss growing old together compared to a life of apparently never aging.

In case you didn’t catch the sarcasm that all was a joke. I am in complete support of people getting married and am really excited to attend a dear friends wedding next week.

On a more serious note I could have easily let what Em said, get to me. It would have been easy to take the offhanded comment of a nine year old to heart. This offhanded comment could have been rubbing salt in my unmarried/no relationship in site wound, but I am trying not to let that married/ boyfriend wound exist. Most of the time it is pretty easy. I am enjoying what God is doing in my life and the opportunities that keep coming my way. Days of throwing little pity parties still exist though. If  I am being completely honest sometimes discontent sneaks in without my knowledge. Waking up some mornings I have to again address the bitterness that wedges its way into my heart.

Ecclesiates chapter 3 is always a chapter that I turn to when feeling weighed down by my desires for a relationship. The common phrase “For everything there is a season” comes from these chunk of verses. While it doesn’t specify in these verses that there is a time to be married and a time to be single I think this chapter tells us that there is a time for everything, which includes being single. If you are single you have to really take to heart that it is a time of life that God is using you for.

Single years should be treated like the gift that they are. Single years are an amazing time to really figure out who you are as a child of God. Because listening to His guidance is important wether single or married. And God is far more important than any relationship you will ever be in.

Not that I am speaking of being in need, for I have learned in whatever situation I am to be content. I know how to be brought low and I know how to abound. In any and every circumstance, I have learned the secret of facing plenty and hunger, abundance and and need. Philippians 4:11-12

Some of the best marriage advise I have ever heard is be content in God first. Now I am not married, but this sounds like great advice to me. If we are first content in God and he is enough for us, then we will also be content when our husbands don’t bring us flowers or empty the dishwasher. We should find our joy in God and not from our husbands, friends, family or material possessions.

Set Your Minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. Colossians 3:2

Seeing the single years as a blessing is not always as easy as it looks on paper. Sometimes it can be extremely hard because I do want to be married. Being a wife and mom has been a dream of mine since I was old enough to rock baby dolls and make mud pies. Just because I want something doesn’t mean that I let it consume my thoughts though. I also really want a new camera lens. Sadly I don’t have the money for a new lens right now. So instead of investing all of my time into figuring out which lens is the best I spend my time learning how to use my current setup better. Then when I can afford a new lens I will understand my camera better and can better put the new lens into use. It is the same with single years. Figure out how to use your current singleness to best glorify God’s kingdom. Then if you are blessed with a husband you will be able to role that relationship with God and the abilities you have gained while single right over into married life and you will be able to serve your husband and the church better because of the choices you made while single.

I want to leave you with the closing thought of don’t let what others say negatively impact you. Sometimes people can accidentally, or sadly sometimes purposefully,  say what could possible be hurtful words. Remember you are beautiful and God loves you married, single, in a relationship, going through a breakup or anywhere else on the spectrum. Find your joy in him and not in anything of this world especially not what people say meaning well. If you are truly content where God has you, the sometimes well meant comments won’t bother you, that is if you even notice them at all.

♥ AK Girl Out ♥

So flee youthful passions and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace, along with those who call on the Lord from a pure heart. 2 Timothy 2:22



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